just an addition: neither left nor right are political positions; if they were, people would try to make them make sense or hang together or something. they're social affiliations. so here's my advice for you if you're on the right or the left: stop pretending to take positions or make assertions. it only makes you look ridiculous. smile at people who are wearing or driving the right brand, have to right haircut, live in the right region, went to the right school, and so on, and make obscene gestures otherwise. really that's all you're doing anyway.
daily beast: exclusive! newt's ex-wife's lawyer on his narcissism. now i would say few of us would really be satisfied to be portrayed in the media by our ex-spouses. (mine - one of mine - just sold a book including an account of our break-up; i intend to ignore it unless pressed, then launch the nukes, or at least the blog posts.) but your ex-spouse's lawyer? christ, tina, that's your idea of journalism?: a first-person account of somebody's marriage by a person who is actually being paid to eviscerate the person she's writing about? your ex-spouse might be bitter, might have what you take to be a distorted view of events, etc., but at least she's going to be more or less sincere. this is more like hiring lady gaga's producer to review her next album.
DENVER—A former Colorado lawman who was once named the nation's sheriff of the year was charged Friday with drug and prostitution offenses after authorities said he offered methamphetamine to a man in exchange for sex.
Patrick Sullivan Jr., 68, was being held on $500,000 bond in an isolation cell at a jail named in his honor in suburban Denver. Arapahoe County Sheriff Grayson Robinson said current or former law enforcement officials are usually kept from the general inmate population for their safety at the Patrick J. Sullivan Jr. Detention Facility.
Prosecutors charged Sullivan with felony distribution, possession of meth as well as a misdemeanor charge of soliciting prostitution. Authorities say he offered methamphetamine in exchange for sex from a male acquaintance in a sting set up by officers with a drug task force.
now that i'm trying to avoid the nytimes, i'm having some trouble finding reasonable sites. current headlines on slate:
What's the Deal with Moms Who Won't Wash Their Hair?
Trick-Shot Doc: You Won't' Believe what This Guy Can Do With a Tongue Depressor
Ode to a Composting Toilet
Prince William's College of Love: The Bizarre Sex Toy Collection at St. Andrews University, Where He and Kate Middleton Met
Are Those Texas Wildfires Really Setting Horses on Fire?
David Foster Wallace's Stunning Critique of Boredom
that sex toy thing is probably the most gratuitous headline ever written, like 'insane! the schizo dude located 23 miles south/southwest of kate middleton's dress designer.' who'd have thought that boredom required a critique? much less an interminable critique by our greatest postmodern intellect and transcendent genius novelist? i am literally stunned, so much so that i'm tempted to write a critique of stunnedness. if david foster wallace hadn't hanged himself, i'd hang him, if only to relieve the meta-tedium.
i'd say the anti-smoking police have ramped up the hysteria to maximum: Even One Cigarette Can Prove Lethal, U.S. Surgeon General Says. or even one moment anywhere near someone who's smoking: instant death. where the surgeon general can go after that is not clear, so i guess that's her last appearance on television; thank god we've heard the end of that. still you can't argue with Science. it's almost hard to imagine the litigation atmosphere this creates.
headline: New Yorker accused of plan to attack U.S. troops. i knew it! you could tell they were moving in this direction from hendrick hertzberg's opinion pieces. curse you, david remnick, and all your kind and editorial staff. you start out with a kind of dull house prose style and middle-brow yet intellectually overblown investigations of this and that (malcolm gladwell, say) and this is where you end up. people keep telling you how smart and important you are, and you lose your sense of humor entirely (see "shouts and murmurs"), and with it your perspective and your connection to god and country. you start out absolutely dictating the pecking order of authors in literary fiction - every submission a kind of stalin show trial and each more like lorrie moore than the last - and pretty soon you're mad, mad with power and you're beheading america's heroes live on al qaeda's youtube page.