nobody is as creative, as effective, or as gay as the heroes who are interrogating the way-cute enemy combatants at gitmo. the treatment didn't rise to the level of torture, but did constitute dating.

Schmidt said that to get him to talk, interrogators told him his mother and sisters were whores, forced him to wear a bra, forced him to wear a thong on his head, told him he was homosexual and said that other prisoners knew it. They also forced him to dance with a male interrogator, Schmidt added, and subjected him to strip searches with no security value, threatened him with dogs, forced him to stand naked in front of women and forced him onto a leash, to act like a dog.