not being

the one person i least want to be, or for that matter want to be around, is john malkovich as represented in the iphone ads. his taste and his demeanor are so fucking precious, so gratuitously yet blankly pretentious, so numbly self-satisfied, that all i want to do is eat a burger, pull on a baseball cap, jump into the truck, throw on some george jones, and head to nyc to kick his ass. that's what siri is thinking as she talks to him; you can hear her rolling her eyes.